I grew up in a hostile environment where my dad constantly abused my mother physically. He always looked for reasons to beat her. I remember a particular Christmas when he hit her with a big plank. The wound from that incident left a scar that she still bears today.
My mum was a member of our church’s marriage committee, but she was ousted. Her marriage was not a good example for others to follow, due to the physical abuse she suffered from my dad. On several occasions, we asked her to leave before he killed her, but she refused. She always said that she would endure for the sake of her children.
I was traumatised and depressed for a long time. However, my mum didn’t let my father’s behaviour deter her. Despite her age and responsibilities, she forged ahead with her education, bagged a PhD and was even able to buy the property that the family now lives in.
I’m grateful to God that my mum didn’t lose her life during those horrible years. I know that many people who have died from domestic violence. Somehow, she survived and was strong enough to stay by us.
My parents’ marriage has made me scared of getting married. I am afraid I might turn out exactly like my father. I am not so certain that I have forgiven my dad. He has changed, but I’m just grateful that my mum is doing well and enjoying the fruits of her labour.